Game Day and the Car Ride Home
Let the game finish before turning it into a lesson.
Supporting Your Child in Sport
The conversation after a game can stay with a child long after the final whistle. If the first thing they hear is a list of mistakes, they may learn to dread the trip home. If they feel safe and supported, they are more likely to talk openly about what went well and what was difficult.
Before the Game
Keep It Simple:
“Have fun, work hard and be a good teammate.”
Avoid Extra Pressure
Avoid adding pressure with predictions, demands or reminders of what is at stake.
Unconditional Support:
Make sure your child knows your support is not dependent on the result.
During the Game
Cheer Positively:
Cheer positively for your child and the team.
Let Coaches Coach:
Leave coaching instructions to the coach. Multiple voices can confuse or overwhelm players.
Respect Officials:
Respect the officials’ decisions and avoid shouting at players, coaches or referees.
Embrace Mistakes:
Remember that children are learning; errors and missed shots are part of basketball.
After the Game
Connect First:
Start with connection, not correction.
Show Appreciation:
Try: “I loved watching you play,” “How did you find it?” or “What was fun today?”
Listen with Empathy:
If your child is upset, listen first. You do not need to solve every disappointment immediately.
Respect Their Space:
If they do not want to talk, respect that. You can check in later.
Three Supportive Messages
“I love watching you play.”
“I’m proud of the effort you put in.”
“I’m here for you—whatever the scoreboard says.”
A Useful Check-In
Ask your child what they like and dislike about post-game conversations. Agree on a way to talk that helps them feel supported rather than assessed.
